Release

Dear Friends,

I am trying to be positive, as I know I am the only person who can create my own happiness. Lately however, there has been a part me of that just wants to let everything out and have the feeling or release. The only issue is I haven’t found a suitable method of letting it all out; If that is screaming, shouting, or just destroying something.

I’m not going to rehash what has been going on with everything, either you know or just ask me. What has been driving me crazy has been everyone suggestions about what I need to do about my issues. As I am welcome for the input, but a lot if the time I just need someone to vent to, and usually I will figure out a method on how to proceed. I am not being ungrateful I just need to let out my thoughts, and then I feel better. If I ask for advice please give it, or just wait for me just release it all then comment that’s all I ask.

The next annoyance comes from work. As much as I was glad to get my new position, but there is a lot of things that has made me just want to AHHHH. Which is the real lack of a job description, I.E. what I meant to be doing on a daily biases. Also let me say the lack of extra pay has been a FUCKER!! But I will deal with that in due course.

A knock on effect of this situation has led to me not able to make a positive step forward to carving out my own life. As such it had depressed me and made me angry, and that’s what has made me the angriest of all. I was so close to getting out of this personal situation and now I’m no closer than I was a couple months ago. That is the real frustration, when you think you are going to get something and then it gets taken away from you just like that.

With the anger that has built up inside of me has made me want to go out and get physical. Like I said before I don’t know if kicking the crap out of someone will help, but I am up for giving it a go. But I know all the mental health professionals say I should be doing some form of exercise to help burn away some of these extra emotions. As I know I should, but I have yet found myself want to follow up on these needs.

All I want to say with this post is I want to let go of everything negative feeling I have in my mind, body and soul. I don’t know how to do that exactly, but one thing I do know I will figure it out, and hopefully it will not end in me kicking someone’s teeth in and getting arrested.

Xo FabEs