Birthday Post
All I Want For My Birthday…
Dear friends,
As this year has been an epic shit show, I did expect to have birthday amongst this pile of crap we call 2020. However, I know I can never let a birthday go by and not celebrate it. Given the number of people who have lost their lives this year, I think me finding some way to celebrate it is necessary. As the year is a shit show, I am very limited to the way I could.
I’m still going to do my normal birthday things, a bottle of bubbly in the morning, get myself something nice (TREAT YOURSELF!) you enjoy being XXXII. This is all good and well, but for me I hoped this year would be more of a celebration. As a way of having all my friends around, enjoying and celebrate my life. As everyone is against big groups it’s a no, no. With having so many people I know who are either, key works or at risk there is not much I can do.
I find it funny that my birthday being on a Friday and not being able to celebrate it properly is bit of a piss take. Back in the beginning of the year, I had some ideas of what I wanted to do. I wanted to have a nice weekend celebrating. Get on plane or train and celebrate somewhere in Europe. My original plan was spending a weekend in Paris and spending a day at Disneyland. How magical it might have been, and in an alternate universe that might have happened. Or the more realistic vision I would have liked, having my new home and have nice intimate get together.
I am not moaning, but simply stating facts. I am not the only one who has had their birthday ruined due to the new rules of the world. It’s weird how one thing can just throw you off. Normally I get so excited when my birthday happens, I have plans and ideas coming out of my ass. This year however, I'm just like, umm dinner? When I say I’m thrown off I really am thrown off. I mean normal I know one thing I could ask my family to get me, and I honestly cannot think of a thing.
It’s not that I am greedy, or I just like to get things. There has been a large part of me has always thought, what is one thing I can ask someone to get me. As I’m the kind of person who gets a lot of things on a whim and spur of the moment. Last Christmas and this birthday I have been struggling with. I can always expect people to get me something they think I will like, and that’s fine. But my mum is the kind of person who needs a suggestion or a guide. When you can’t think of something it’s it because more of annoyance. The day I wrote this, I was asked do I want a game for my birthday, and to be honest I don't want more games. Not that I would be ungrateful, I just want to attack some of my backlog before I get any new releases.
The question is, what do I want? I keep singing I want a big booty hoe, but I don't think that’s realistic, in the sense I’d get a guy I’d want or like. As I am now in trust of adult life, I thought about asking for something practical. Since everything practical I either own, or don’t have space for. Like a glass jug blender, want one, but no space in the house to store it. As for the other little things that I might need, there isn’t much. Nothing that’s springs to mind as I write this. As for clothes and shoes, I don't want anything new while I’m a couple sizes too big and a little heavy.
A lot of my birthday ideas had to do with this idea I would be either living alone or preparing to live alone. That way I could have had my friends over for the intimate get together for, as a housewarming. As for the gifts, I could have asked for one of the many things I might have needed in my home. As COVID has taken all this away from me, it makes things flat.
As for what I am going to do, I don't know. I think getting out would be smart idea since I’ve had so much time at home recently, but even that creates problems. One idea I had was a weekend of separate meets with people, to at least see people. But that idea doesn't really sound like a celebration with all my friends, which is what I’d really want. All I can do is postpone my celebration to another time. What is the longest you can float a birthday? A month, two next year? I don't know, if you do letters in an email.
When proofing this I forgot one of the biggest things, which is normal the showcase for my celebration, the cake. I’ve had no idea as what kind of cake I would like to make, which I usual have an idea of flavor. Then I would then decide on the shape, I think one of the things I was thinking earlier in the year, (when I had hope) book shaped. Think my current plan is to head to Egg Free Cake Shop an get a verity of cake slices or cup cakes (TREAT YO SELF!)
The one thing I do know for my birthday I have to treat myself to something. A birthday is a privilege I am proud to have, and even in these troubled times I need to celebrate this one. Especially since this year I have so much to be proud of. I’m just hoping no one falls into the habit of getting baking books or bakeware. I HAVE ENOUGH! Screw it, I might just spend the weekend getting loaded on the bubbly.
Xo FabEs
